Women are most likely to divorce four years after an even marriage, when they are in their late twenties, early thirties. During this period, women are likely to experience a “pre-midlife crisis,” which is more similar to men’s midlife crisis, but with distinct differences that make women more likely than men to cheat and act unfaithfully. There are several stages that often occur during a woman’s long-term romantic relationship marriage:
Stage 1 –
Women start to feel as if something is missing in their lives at Stage 1. They have everything they want in a home, a family, a really great husband, but they always feel like they are happier than they should be right now. After a while, many women at this stage start to lose their love for sex, and it is not uncommon for them to start trying to deliberately avoid physical contact with their husbands, because they think it will lead to sex. They begin to complain about minor physical discomforts and avoid going to bed with their husbands at the same time, and they begin to think of sex more as a job, no different from washing dishes, grocery shopping, etc. Some women in Stage 1 say they feel like they are being raped when their husbands touch them. Their bodies feel cold and their chests feel tight, and they have a sick feeling inside. Most Stage 1 women feel that something is wrong with them, that they are defective. They also worry if their sexual apathy will make their husband have an affair or leave them.
Stage 2 –
Stage 2 –
Women in Stage 2 experience a thirsty look rekindled by the passion of an extramarital relationship. Whether this extramarital encounter with a new man is mixed or unmixed with sexual aspects, women will throw themselves into these new lovers with great affection
Many women in this stage have not had sexual urges for a long time. But at the same time, many women also experience tremendous feelings of remorse and guilt, whether this new relationship of theirs involves sexual acts or is purely emotional or both. Many women begin to experience what could be defined as a “self-identity crisis,” including those who want to put these feelings behind them. The stimuli, the reminders, are everywhere, all the time. Whether they see it in the media or talk about it at home with their husbands or with relatives and friends, they feel very guilty whenever the subject of infidelity is mentioned. Women at this stage are no longer able to express their disdain and hatred for infidelity as they once did, which would make them feel hypocritical. They feel as if they have lost a part of themselves, weighing in on our society’s belief that girls are either good girls or bad girls. This is when they will question their good girl status and feel that they may not deserve their current husbands. Many women become more considerate and appreciative of their husbands in order to overcome this guilt. However, after a while, many women’s thoughts begin to take the cheating behavior toward justice. In order to keep their desire for another man going, women attribute this desire back to the fact that they can’t get it in their marriage or couldn’t find it with their husband before. Many women begin to make negative, sarcastic, and resentful comments about their marriages and husbands. It’s not surprising that extramarital affairs would occur in this situation.
Stage 3 –
Stage 3 –
Women in Stage 3 are at the stage of getting involved in an affair, ending it, or considering divorce. Women who are in an affair experience a feeling like no other, they feel reborn, and many women feel they have finally found their soul mate.
It is typical for these women to also experience the great pain of choosing between their husband and their new lover. They understand that what they are doing is wrong and unjust to their husbands. But they just can’t make up their minds to end the relationship. Many women try so many times to end it that before they see their lover, they swear it’s the last time, but they just can’t keep their vows.
Unable to resolve to end their affair, women in Stage 3 feel that their lover is their soulmate because they don’t realize that it’s really just the chemistry of the first phase of their love that makes them so desperate. Many women will live in this state of make-believe for years. “Should I get a divorce or not?” This question often comes up in the minds of women in stage 3, and women in this stage often ask their husbands for a separation. Many husbands of women in this stage will disregard their wives’ past or present complaints and grievances, and will be more considerate, spend more time with their wives, and help their wives with household chores in order to save the marriage and to turn them on, but all this is in vain. But all these are in vain. For women in stage 3, the last thing they want is to be there for their husbands.
The reason many women offer to look at separation at this point is that they want to get to know themselves better. They try to convince their husbands that it is possible to save the marriage if they can each spend some time on their own. They tell their husbands that a time apart is the only hope to fix their current relationship. Women at this stage want to free themselves from the bondage of marriage so that they can spend more time with their lovers. Many women think that this will give them ultimate clarity from their confusion, and they are sure that they will finally know for sure whether to continue their marriage or divorce and be with their lover. Separation allows women in this stage to continue to enjoy the good feelings their lovers bring them without giving up the security of marriage. Most of the husbands of women at this stage are unaware that their wives are having an affair, and their gullibility stems largely from their wives’ indifference to sex and their conviction that their wives are good girls.
Women in Stage 3 may also be in a position to end an affair, and it may not always be their decision to end the relationship. They may be dating single lovers who have lost their love for them due to a lack of developmental future or are attracted to other single women. The end of an extramarital relationship often brings pain and grief to women. They may become extremely depressed and extremely hateful towards their husbands. They do not realize that they are simply experiencing a reaction to a sudden change in the chemicals in their brain. As a result, they may feel that they have lost the opportunity to make themselves happy and joyful because of their indecisiveness.
Believing that they have figured out what they really want from their partner, women at this stage often focus a lot of energy on finding a “new” relationship. A woman at this stage often focuses a lot of energy on finding a “new” relationship, one that brings her the same feelings as her last affair. Starting a new relationship with a new lover also represents a fresh, clean start and a chance for these women to feel like a good girl again. Some women start looking for a new partner during their separation. Other women will return physically to their previous married life, but continue to search emotionally. Some women will have sporadic sex with their husbands to secure their marriage until they finally make their own decision. Although they are not sexually attracted to their husbands, women’s sexual desires are briefly rekindled when they suspect their husbands are cheating or considering cheating, or when they think their husbands may be leaving them.
Stage 4 –
Stage 4 –
Women in Stage 4 include those who choose not to divorce but continue to develop an extramarital relationship and those who choose to divorce. Some women who continued to have extramarital relationships reported that staying in the relationship facilitated sex within the marriage. Some women thought their lovers were their soul mates, but for one reason or another, they did not leave their husbands, but they also did not feel torn in half by either. Other women feel that not being with their lovers every day has reinforced their feelings, and these women are almost always in an extramarital relationship with a married man. They think their affair can go on endlessly without destroying their original marriage.
Women who choose to divorce and are at the beginning of a new relationship generally report that the decision to do so is a relief and a relief that they can have a sense of normalcy again. Many women who had been divorced and then married for several years seemed reluctant to talk about the details of their previous experiences. Still, they mention feelings of guilt, remorse that they hurt their children and their ex-husbands, but now find themselves in this new marriage feeling the same as they did before.
Women’s cheating and infidelity will not only continue to be extremely common down the road, but will also continue to climb. The end of relationships and marriages caused by women cheating in relationships and marriages is due to the lack of information and knowledge that both men and women have on this topic.