There are three qualities that I want my lover to have.
First, there is pragmatic simplicity and diligence.
Many young, uninitiated people are prone to think that the biggest obstacle to a relationship is simply not loving, lacking an understanding of the real dust and hardships of life, and being extraordinarily fond of exaggerating the sincerity and love of each other through thick and thin. When entering society, imagination to the ground, personally began to face the real challenges, the actual situation is certainly far more than a pat on the head of passion to difficult, trivial, troublesome many. The most powerless thing in the world is determination that doesn’t come at a price.
Of course I hate the idea of looking at money without looking at people, of calculating and alienating people. But equally, I don’t agree with looking at people without looking at money, which is also an alienation of money. Money certainly does not take up all of a person’s value, but it must be part of his value. Money doesn’t have to be the devil or dung, but rather a measure of whether a person is down-to-earth, hard-working, and smart. You can say you don’t care about money, but can you say you don’t care if the other person is down-to-earth, hard-working, and smart? Use this underlying logic and you can figure out the relationship between money and people.
Talking about money beforehand is exactly the most universal measure of how much he values this relationship. The company’s main goal is to provide a comprehensive range of products and services to the public.
In the modern world of material abundance, the plight of the hungry and cold is easy to overcome, but the humility and indignity of the spirit is hard to bear. The Gift of the Magi”, the husband saw his wife selling her hair to buy herself a watch, the gift of the moment is certainly fantastic, touching. But O’Henry cunning cunning in his story’s ending is framed in that moment, not allowing the reader to see the reality of the aftermath – in the next few days, how should the husband face his wife with short hair? Will his self-esteem be tortured during the long hours together? These are the kinds of things you’d hardly expect if you were swept away by a romantic ending.
So, a simple relationship is not the same as an undignified one, and a relationship that talks about money is not the same as a hypocritical one. Even more, money justifies romance. The pragmatic is the basis of retreat. To judge whether a person is devout about love and romance, don’t just look at the skin show, but also see if he will willingly endure the necessary pragmatism in order to arrive at a subdued romance. One is the end of the day to you sweet talk, swear, pick the moon pick the stars, every day stick to you, hate to grow on you, the critical moment but can only go to borrow money people. One is desperately working to make money, rarely with you, rarely with you to play King’s Glory, but the car he secretly ready, you have something to shoot out of the bank card immediately. The company’s main business is to provide a wide range of products and services to its customers.
I think the person who fights the gravitational pull of reality for you is perhaps a deeper kind of love than the one who creates a vague illusion.
Second, respect each other’s personal independence.
I don’t want my lover to have tricky little wits and inflated possessiveness, to dominate and control each other in reality or in spirit. For example, denying my hobbies, scorning my ideas, constraining my interactions, obnoxiously interfering with personal space, not politely revealing my subtle eagerness to hide my self, etc.
I want lovers to respect each other’s personal independence. Interactions in life should always be kind, simple, and honest. Even if the other person and you are in conflict about something, you can try to transition to unobtrusive consideration and understanding.
Serious misunderstandings should definitely be resolved with reason, but it is not necessary to be reasonable all the time in emotions, and we should learn to remain naive and demented, and keep some differences to shape boundaries. The difference is freedom, and letting the other person’s ego go is a higher form of communion and space release. If you really appreciate and want each other’s genuine care, you can’t use vain possessiveness to hurt each other, and don’t destroy each other’s spiritual independence and personal freedom. The first thing you need to do is to be able to love each other more, but you also have to deliberately set up that veil, we need that veil, we need a comfort zone for ourselves.
Don’t disturb each other’s peace with pervasive aggression. A shared emotional life should be about looking up at distant celestial bodies together, through thick and thin. Not each with selfish weapons in hand, slaughtering each other for two to become one. You are not my rib, you are you. I love you, I don’t love my ribs.
Third, there is the cast of true love rather than the fit of relationship.
While it is rare for a piano to be in harmony and a good match to be made, I also carry the expectation of seeking a soul mate.
I want love to be romantic, where we focus on the material but also go beyond it. I especially fear that human affection is swayed by data, distorted by ratios, and simplified by labels. Those anchored to a more precise fit, a more secure probability, are kingly matches, flagging rivalries. Thus bronze can never meet diamond, and it is taboo for Brahmin and Dalit to fall in love. The company’s main goal is to provide the best possible service to its customers.
In the current climate of marriage, people seem to be more concerned with “have you accomplished your mission” than “have you been loved”. It’s as if marriage is not about completing love, but about building the relationship itself. I am sick of individuals being deprived by the flood, sick of pre-determined relationships, sick of the constancy of the process and its unexpected disappearance, sick of people being pushed by circumstances and unconsciously abandoning the search for true love.
I look forward to having someone like this, where we help each other in life and share the same ideas – we came this way the same way, even the same way still left in some secret hometown. We have seen the same animations, read the same fairy tales, experienced the common sufferings and happiness in this land, and have the same testimonies and memories of dragonflies and snowflakes. Everything serves as a cipher for our acquaintance in a precise ambush, without rhetoric or exaggeration, casually mentioning each other to properly shelter those feelings of each other that have nowhere to rest. We can then identify each other as kindred spirits: You are my nest, I am your cave. As long as you and I can identify with each other and underline each other, there will be some solid certainty in my heart that you are the origin of the world, and as long as you are still there, my existence is not suspicious or indistinct, and as long as you are still there, it is enough for me to resist the countless hypocrisies, wavering, insipidity, and dislocation in the world.
This kind of cast can get us through the trivial and through the long. The emotions at the beginning of a partner’s relationship are a complete marble, and time will continue to wear and erode it, making it less perfect. And while true love, of course, is also subject to the weathering of time, being in tune allows us to overcome this imperfection, even as we continue to endure falling away and stripping away, suffering loss and abandonment. But on the day you reach the end of your life, you will finally understand that the wear and tear of these long years is all so that we can, at the end, discover the magnificent Venus hidden in marble.