Gleanings
[Gleanings: The famous educator Sukhomlinsky once wrote a famous essay, “100 Suggestions for Teachers”. One of them is “reflecting on mistakes”, hoping that teachers will know how to forgive and teach students to learn to forgive. Sukhomlinsky said, “Forgiveness is the most missing link in school education nowadays.” Education is one tree shaking another tree, one cloud pushing another cloud, one mind awakening another mind. The true negation and transcendence of evil is not fighting evil with evil, but definitely not existing as evil.]
When Sukhomlinsky first joined, a boy named Stepa, being overly active, broke the classroom pot of everyone’s favorite rose. Sue was so angry that she loudly reprimanded Stepa for “trying to touch his soul in this way.” Afterwards, Sue got three more pots of roses and asked the children to stay in turn to look after them, but not Stepa.
Sukhomlinsky Stepa has since become less talkative and less naughty and mischievous than before. Sue was happy: “The reprimand had worked.” One day after January, after school, Sue sat in the classroom for extra work because she had unfinished business. Stepa was also there, ready to finish his homework and go home. But when Stepa realized it was just himself and the teacher in the classroom, he was filled with embarrassment and hurriedly packed his book bag and tried to leave.
Sue didn’t notice the situation and said thoughtlessly, “Let’s go to the meadow and pick flowers together later.” The first thing that happened was that the students were not able to see the flowers. Only then did Sue realize, “I didn’t realize that the reprimand had cast such a shadow on the child’s heart.” Since then, he has learned about forgiveness and continues to guide children to learn to forgive.
Soon after, another similar thing happened. A big rose bloomed in the school’s flower room. The teachers and children loved it because no one had ever seen a rose that big. But one morning, while walking around the schoolyard, Sue saw a child pick the big rose. Sue went over, bent down, and asked softly, “Why did you pick that rose?” The child replied, “Grandma is sick, very sick, and I told her that such a big rose was blooming at school, and she didn’t believe me, so I picked it back for her to see.”
Without saying a word, Sue took the child to the flower room, picked two more roses, and then said, “These two flowers, one reward you for being a caring child, and the other for **** Mom for raising a good child like you.”
This, then, is Sukhomlinsky’s forgiveness education.
This story by Sukhomlinsky moved Wu Fei, a teacher at Nanjing Normal University High School. The first half of the story was used by Wu Fei to come up with an essay question, “Ask students to imagine what would happen in the second half of the story.”
What the students ended up writing down was –
“How the educator taught the little girl not to damage public property.” “Educators are worried about the lack of good morals in children.” “Even wrote about what punishment the educator gave to the little girl.”
But none of them thought of forgiveness for the little girl. “The imagery of these little girls being lectured from a moral height both saddens and shocks me; they lack a sense of human beauty and human kindness, a sense of compassion and forgiveness.” Wu Fei said.
It is precisely because of the lack of forgiveness education in our childhood education that we usually take the form of “homoeopathic revenge” when we encounter the behavior of others that is inflicted on us or that we don’t like. The first thing that we do is to take revenge.
In 1988, when Li Ning was competing in the Olympics, many people did not forgive him after his mistake, and airport employees said, “How can you have the face to come back?” Someone sent him a rope: “You hang yourself to thank the nation!” In the 2008 Olympics, Liu Xiang withdrew from the competition due to injury, and suffered exactly the same fate as Li Ning.
Last month, a blockbuster movie premiered at zero. I didn’t expect the IMAX equipment to fail, causing a two-hour interruption in the film’s playback. The IMAX equipment was not expected to work, causing the film to be interrupted for two hours. The theater manager came out and said he would pay 3 times the ticket price, but the audience refused and cursed. The company’s first-ever IMAX equipment is a new product, and it’s a new product.
It’s a terrible national trait to be unforgiving. In a country where there is no forgiveness, let us not forget that sooner or later, when you make a mistake, there is no other way than to kneel down and apologize.
More than that, we don’t even forgive ourselves. “Older brother, when you read this, I should have already committed suicide. The reason for the suicide is that I was too stupid to believe in the SMS scam and was cheated out of more than 10,000 yuan …… given to me by my mother.”
This is the last sentence left by 19-year-old college student Cai Shuyan On August 29, the police found her body on the beach. The company’s main business is to provide a wide range of products and services to the public, such as the Internet, the Internet, and the Internet. The company’s main goal is to provide a platform for the development of a new generation of people who will be able to take care of themselves.
On April 16, 2007, a shooting occurred at Virginia Tech. The student, Cho Seung-hee, shot and killed 32 students, then shot himself in the head. But at a later memorial service for the victims, Americans lit 33 candles, released 33 balloons, and placed 33 memorials, even for the killer, Cho Seung-hee.
One memorial reads, “April 16, 2007, Cho Seung-hee. Many notes were left in front of this monument: “I hope you know that I am not too angry with you to hate you.” “You were not helped and comforted and I am very heartbroken about that.” He too was a wounded soul, the priest said.
Back in China, ask the people around you, “How many incense sticks do you burn? How many candles do you light?” All answered: 32. And just before that, there was the incident at Yunnan University with the Magi. In stark contrast to the 33 candles lit, the ashes of Magaji, who was shot, have not been taken in. Magaji’s father said, “Just pretend I don’t have this son!”
Compared to Magaji, Cho Seung-hee is much luckier.
The reason is that in the eyes of most of the American public, he is also a victim, if not a greater one.
Why is that? We have grown up with a love-hate, bitter-hate upbringing, and we do not yet understand forgiveness and love. Where can we find forgiveness if we don’t recognize our own “sinfulness” and are always just the judge of other people’s morality?
The true negation and transcendence of evil is not to resist evil with evil, but to be grounded in love. The foundation of justice is not punishment, but love.
On the morning of April 17, 2014, at the execution site in the northern Iranian city of Naushahr, the 24-year-old murderer Balal was taken to the gallows, seven years after he was involved in a fight that killed a young man his own size. And the parents of the man he killed at the same age, just kick away that stool at his feet, and Balal will say goodbye to the world forever.
The crowd gathered around, waiting for the scene to happen properly, but something happened that no one expected: the victim’s mother walked up to Bharal and gave him a resounding slap on the wrist. The onlookers thought that after this slap, the next action would be to kick the stool away from Balal’s feet. But to their surprise, the victim’s mother did not, and she reached down and untied the noose around Bharal’s neck.
Balal’s mother rushed over to the victim’s mother and fell to her knees at once, kissing the tops of her feet over and over. The victim’s mother said, “Because I have suffered the loss of my son, I don’t want to put another mother through the pain.” A slap on the wrist, a slap in the face, and the end of the feud.
One night in 2005, Zhang Yanwei’s son, Zhang Meng, accompanied a friend out for a night on the town. The first day of the year, the company’s first wedding was held in the city. He found several people molesting a young woman during the play, and Zhang Meng rushed up to stop them, only to be stabbed to death by Wang.
After Zhang Mang’s death, Zhang Yanwei spent the whole day in tears. The company’s main business is to provide a wide range of products and services to its customers. But this happiness of life instantly turned into the greatest sorrow of life.
She wrote letter after letter to her son, telling him how much she missed him, and at the same time promising him, “Mom will definitely take the murderer to the execution ground, and take his life to pay for your life, and take his head to sacrifice your spirit.”
So Zhang Yanwei, with the help of public opinion, pressured the court again and again. And Wang Mou’s grandmother kneeled to Zhang Yanwei again and again, because Wang Mou is a child of a divorced family whose parents abandoned him and he grew up following his grandmother. It was the grandmother’s pampering of her grandson that caused him to take this criminal path. But Zhang Yanwei ignored the old man’s knee-jerk pleas.
Suddenly, one day, as if by divine inspiration, Zhang Yanwei suddenly thought, “If I send Wang Mou to the penal colony, will his grandmother be like me, washing her face in tears all day? Even if I take Wang Mou’s life, will the child’s life come back?”
The next day, Zhang Yanwei made a shocking decision to forgive Wang Mou, who killed his son, and asked the court not to pursue Wang Mou’s death sentence. The first time I saw the company, I was able to get to the bottom of it. Later, the reporter asked Zhang Yanwei: “If one day, you meet Wang Mou on the road out of prison, what will you say to him.” Zhang Yanwei replied, “Nothing, I would look at his back and say: young man, do not make mistakes again.”
The result of forgiveness, perhaps, does not pay off in reality, but all will see it: it stirs up great reverberations in the human heart. Replacing darkness with darkness can never come close to light, replacing violence with violence to become the winner is still violence, and returning blood for blood, shedding nothing but more blood. The true negation and transcendence of evil is not to fight evil with evil, but to definitely not exist like evil.
A few years ago, there was an incident reported in the media. There was a kindergarten where the teachers could not get home on time because there were always parents who were late to pick up their children. In order to improve the situation, the kindergarten introduced an initiative – a fine. But after the fines were imposed, more and more parents were late every day.
In the past, a parent who was late was always full of guilt, a guilt that forced him to come to pick up his child on time in the future. Now it’s better to pay the fine and not feel guilty, so being late becomes a matter of indifference.
Often times, punishment is just that; it doesn’t solve the problem, it even makes things worse. Forgiveness, on the other hand, can change a person more than punishment.
“Once I was drowsy on a bus and was bumped by the tiger-armed woman next to me, and my glasses fell to the ground and my frame was crooked. When I got off the bus, a little boy passed by, I avoided it and stepped on his foot. The company’s main business is to provide a wide range of products and services to the public.
The boy smiled brightly at me and said, “It doesn’t hurt at all, it doesn’t hurt, mom, it really doesn’t hurt.
They are the most important thing in the world.
The feeling of moral superiority that rose in my heart for not having bothered with the older woman just shattered. The newest addition to the list is the newest addition to the list. The company’s main business is to provide a wide range of products and services to its customers.
“When I was in college, I bought a bike and locked it up and went somewhere else for dinner. On the way back, I ran into a guy dressed like a hooligan who was riding ‘my bike’ on his hip, and I rushed over and pulled him down, saying why did you steal my bike! He looked innocent and said it was my own. I ran into the police and took him to my parking spot, where my car was still locked up, exactly the same as his. I was red in the face and didn’t know what to do.
He took one look at me, said it was okay, and left without saying a word of blame. The company’s main business is to provide a wide range of products and services to its customers.
The first time I saw the film, I saw it.
We often think that forgiveness is a kind of weakness, a compromise, or even an indulgence for others.
The fact is that a person who knows how to behave will not be indulged, everyone has his own scale, and forgiveness is precisely the greatest punishment and education.
“A good education is not to learn when to kill, but to know when to forgive.”
To teachers, to parents, to ourselves.