Of course, if you make a bad first impression, the closer you get to each other the worse it will get. Judging by physical appearance, for example, is taking 100 pictures of Guo and 1 of Takeshi Kaneshiro, and no matter what, the object people find attractive is always the latter.
Couples should make every effort to be closer
American psychologists once did a survey of couples in love and found that the couples who eventually got married had the highest percentage of success when two people were in a relationship where they were each in a closer geographical location. For example, living close to each other, working in the same office, or working in the same office building, attending the same club activities, etc., so that the two people will have plenty of contact opportunities.
Not only that, but psychologists also conducted a psychological experiment in which college students were shown photos of A and B. Both people had almost the same personal attractiveness, but the photos were shown as often as A:B=2:1, which means that the photos of A were mainly shown, and the result of the experiment was that the vast majority of students were more attracted to A. In fact, the test subjects had never met A and B at all, yet In fact, the test subjects had not met A and B at all, but thought that A was more attractive to them than B.
The reason why A is more attractive than B is that frequent displays remove people’s wariness. So, make phone calls, meet on dates, etc., and recognize that the person you like is the other person, and do your best to approach them.
Of course, if you give a bad first impression of the other person, the closer you get to them, the worse it will get. For example, judging from physical appearance is taking 100 pictures of Guo and 1 picture of Takeshi Kaneshiro, and no matter what, the object people find attractive is always the latter.
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Mental empathy needed after 14 days
Stalking alone still doesn’t work. American psychologist Yoakum conducted such a survey, in which he investigated the friend-selection behavior of 30 first-year college students, all of whom were new to college and had moved into new dorms. Yoakum found that one week after moving in, the effect of physical proximity was strong, and students mostly chose their friends from neighboring dorms. After two weeks, Yoakum found that the two people who became friends were more aligned in their values. This survey proves that even after the initial wariness is removed, if there is a lack of some level of empathy, relationships between people don’t last.
So the two important conditions for couples in a relationship to get along are
1. Physical proximity within the first two weeks.
2. After two weeks, you need to focus on spiritual proximity and empathy.
During the two weeks of proximity, each date, conversation, and meeting is not only about “showing off” yourself, but also about carefully gathering useful information about the other person, such as birthdays, preferences, interests, ideals, etc., and then finding similarities with yourself.
On day 14, focus your conversation on your common hobbies, such as watching movies, traveling, drinking coffee, etc., and expand the scope of your conversation from your similarities. In this way, not only does it remove the other person’s guard, but the other person will be impressed by the increased commonality.
If all goes well, you’ll usually have a breakthrough in your relationship in about two weeks, but of course, if things don’t go as planned, it’s only fair to say that it’s not meant to be, and it’s wise to start over with new contacts.