We often hear people talk about relationships and always say that they have a wound that is hard to heal. This wound is the wound of the heart, from some emotional injury, especially external intentional injury. The first thing you can do is to get the attention of the other person by protesting or even being repulsed by the other person, and the effect can be imagined.
It can be said that intentional harm is the super killer of love, and frequent harm adds a lot of resentment to the lovers’ relationship, which will one day explode. So what are some common and undesirable ways of hurting each other in real love?
Shutting down and playing evaporate after a conflict
A lot of lovers and couples simply shut down their phones and then play evaporate after a fight. This is a typical revenge behavior of the other party, the purpose is to hope that the other party to find themselves while experiencing frustration. I don’t know how to do this, on the one hand, is torturing themselves, can’t help but keep turning on the phone to see if the other party is looking for themselves; on the one hand, let the other party is very worried, and even suspicious, the end is to increase misunderstanding. This is because many lovers will think badly of the situation, thinking that the person who turned off the phone went off to do something with a certain someone.
Using fame and status to blackmail each other
Lovers always involve a lot of financial dealings, for example, in asymmetrical economic conditions, one party will have some expensive gifts from the other party, as small as a cell phone computer or as big as a car or house. If the two sides have a disagreement, they will ask the other side to return their things, or ask the other side to compensate for a favor they have done for the other side, etc. The result is not that the other party succumbs to you, but that it leaves hatred deep inside, and one day the other party wants to get back at you.
Saying breakup easily
Many people will send messages to each other to say something about breaking up as soon as they are unhappy, trying to gain the initiative in the game of love, not knowing that this becomes more passive. The easy to say break up will bring a lot of bad consequences, first of all, let each other feel that you are immature, followed by the establishment of an image of insecurity, and then it is easy to make falsehoods really break up, and finally you want to get back, your lover asked rhetorically: “You did not say that the break up? So I ……” furthermore, many lovers lovers believe that you really love each other, it will not be easy to break up.
Staying out at night
This is a very serious bad choice when living together or getting married. Do you do the right thing or not, then stand up for yourself and think about how you feel if your lover stays out at night. Not staying up at night means you will sleep somewhere that is easy to associate badly, and even if you can still be together later, it will be hard to tell for the rest of your life and become an indelible shadow.
Rebooting old stories
Many lovers or couples, when they fight, want to expose each other’s old stories and try to use them to attack each other. For example, they say their woman is not a virgin and how she was back then; for example, they say their man used to be so and so and how he was last time. If you go to quarrel in this way, it will never end, the current conflict can not be solved outside, new conflicts shaken out, it is difficult to explain who is right and who is wrong. As lovers or lovers, you can’t hold on to someone else’s pigtail, otherwise it will hurt both sides.
Intentionally dating someone else
There are situations where a couple of lovers are temporarily separated after a conflict, and one day one of them sends a message or calls the other asking “What are you doing?”
The other side of the table will be able to answer “I’m with my girlfriend!” on purpose. This kind of want to use their new found a lover to make each other sad, in fact, in the end is to hurt themselves. Especially in the face of the lover, and another person of the opposite sex to go away, then you are really too heartless, you are very selfish, you do not think about how sad your lover will be. The first thing you need to do is to get a good idea of what you want to do.
People who deliberately hurt their lovers appear to have low self-esteem, always wanting to be super in control of love, and as a result become the least in control of love, having difficulty building a good personality and chasing a happy love life.
Did everyone say you were wrong to do this? What are some other ways you shouldn’t use to hurt your feelings?