Internet dating, dating, online cohabitation ……, which are regarded as popular elements of the relationship world, turn out to be one of the characteristics of love panic! Recently, a website conducted an interesting “love survey report” on 20,000 “bachelors”, in which the panic index of both sexes towards love is of great concern.
The higher the education, the later the panic
According to the survey report, education is an important factor in the “age of love panic”. The age of love panic almost always occurs between one and three years after finishing school, and the age of 25 is the age when love panic appears on a large scale. Most people find a satisfying job within one to three years of graduation, and once they have fixed their material base, the idea of finding a relationship starts to jump around in their heads. The higher the education, the more competitive the love will be. Such confidence psychologically leads to the age division of love panic.
Men panic three years later
In a structural analysis of respondents, it was found that as soon as people crossed the age of 25, they started to want to complete their personal lifelong events. For women, the 25-year-old panic is relatively easy to understand. For men, the panic is more of an illusion. Experts analyze that, in terms of marriage age, men are generally higher than women, and by the difference in marriage age between men and women, men’s love panic should be three years later than women’s.
“Three high” women are most at risk
The survey found that members between the ages of 25 and 30 have the greatest likelihood of finding friends and are hot prospects on matchmaking and dating sites. And after the age of 30, the success graph for dating goes all the way down and the difficulty increases geometrically, especially for women. Among them, the three high women with high education, high income and high age are the least favored. The traditional concept of “three high” women inevitably brings a sense of oppression to men, which is suspected of hurting men’s self-esteem.
Symptoms of marriage-phobia
1. eager to meet the opposite sex through various channels and then get a love affair
2. often have nothing to do after work because they are not in a relationship, and like to go to the supermarket alone
3. bored and looking forward to being a light bulb
4.
4. Fascinated by the heroes and heroines of love scenes
5. Remember every wedding you’ve been to. And the website’s counselors suggest that it’s better for courting men and women to face their fears head on and keep a good mindset of going with the flow and relaxing.
Prescription
Prescription: The fear of marriage itself is really out of a sense of insecurity about the uncertainty of the future.
Rx 1: Give yourself the illusion of optimism. People feel fearful and uneasy when faced with some future that they have no control over. The way to cope is simple: give yourself an optimistic assumption and imagination.
Remedy 2: Believe in your ability to cope, and gradually your focus will be on how to increase your ability to cope with change.
Fear of the responsibility that comes with marriage
A pair of running shoes under a snowy white romantic wedding dress, ready to bolt from one end of the aisle, is what big-mouthed sister Julia Roberts said in “Runaway Bride. Roberts’ classic look in “Runaway Bride”. Stala was planning to enter into marriage with her boyfriend of two years. But ever since she decided on a date, she’s felt uncomfortable, afraid of the lifestyle changes that marriage will bring, and always unconsciously looking for reasons to delay the wedding.
Sickness: Retreating and running away
This is the third time Stala has experienced this kind of retreat from marriage. Every time before she prepares for marriage, her mind always conjures up a pile of grease-filled pots and pans, endless laundry and untidy rooms …… Every time she thinks of these, she doesn’t have the courage to step into the marriage hall.
Looking at people caught up in the fear of marriage, there are often two types of people: those who are not confident enough to know that marriage has the possibility of happiness, but are afraid to take the risk and responsibility of future changes. The first one is a person who does not believe that he or she has the ability to cope with the crisis, so he or she is afraid or unwilling to go on this “adventure”.
The other type of person is a person with a strong personality who is overly self-motivated, like Stala, who can take responsibility for herself but is not comfortable being bound by others. They are worried that getting married will cause them to lose their independence and freedom, narrow or even close their social circle, and therefore unconsciously develop a fear of it.