Chinese couples have been talking about “being together and respecting each other” since ancient times. In traditional marriages, people like to integrate their love for their spouses into their lives, which is important, but less spicy and fun. Marriage experts point out that, compared to foreign couples, Chinese marriages tend to lack the following seven things. If you pay more attention and put more effort into it, your married life can become more harmonious and beautiful.
1. A child’s heart: In fact, only when a child’s heart is not sleeping, youth will live forever and love will last forever, so it is best to keep a little more innocence, simplicity, a little more hobbies and curiosity. The company’s main goal is to provide the best possible service to its customers.
2. Romance: Many Chinese families focus too much on practicality and lack romance. Don’t think that romance without borders means offering flowers and dancing, and don’t think that you can’t be romantic without time and money. Be aware that romance comes in a variety of colorful and diverse forms.
3. Humor: Speaking humor can resolve and buffer conflicts and disputes, eliminate embarrassment and disconnection, increase interest and emotion, and make the family happy.
4. Intimacy: Many couples see frequent intimacy as sticky and explain that “not being intimate in public” is a sign of not being frivolous. But expert research has found that intimacy has a wonderful effect on improving the quality of family life, and that people who lack hugs and kisses for long periods of time are prone to “skin hunger,” which in turn produces emotional hunger.
5. Love words: Psychologists believe that spouses should say at least three sentimental words to each other every day, such as “I love you” and “I like your so-and-so. However, many people are too careful to be subtle, rarely put love on the lips, thinking that this is shallow, numbing. Many Chinese couples even want their spouse to show their love in a detailed, thoughtful concern. This is certainly true, but if there are only actions, no words, will not give people a defective feeling of “only the main dish, no garnish”?
6. Communication: Many Chinese couples repress their opinions and displeasure in their psyche, and don’t make them known, but they say they are “good-tempered and cultivated”. The actual fact is that the mutual lockdown can only lead to deeper misunderstandings and long-term repression equals malignant energy, which is more destructive once it explodes. The normal practice should be to enhance communication, opinions, displeasure should be sincere, gentle, tactful to say, and often take the initiative to understand each other’s ideas. Arguing is not necessarily a bad thing, after all it is a means of communication, it should just be about the facts and not personal attacks.
7. Appreciation: People often look at their children with appreciation, so they always think “the child is their best”; and because they often look at their spouse with a critical eye, they always think their wife (husband) is someone else’s best. If you use different eyes to evaluate the same thing, the conclusion will be very different. If you can count your spouse’s many shortcomings without thinking, then you most likely lack an appreciative eye. If you say only the good things about your spouse to your face and behind your back, then you are learning to love and reap the benefits of love.