I’m a married man, 29 years old, with a son who is less than two years old. At one time I thought this was my life, going to work every day and living from 9:00 to 5:00, waiting to retire. But I met her!
She and I used to work in the same unit, and at first she was transferred from another place, and the first time I saw her was when I thought this girl was pretty and cheerful. When I saw her at first, I thought she was a very pretty girl with a cheerful personality. When I was working, I teased her, and we laughed and were fine. It went on like this for more than a year. Until last winter, again I teased her and said I’ll look for you at night, you yourself how lonely ah, brother to accompany you. She said yes! In fact, I had teased her before, and no one took it seriously. But that night I ghostly went to her place of residence and texted her downstairs that I was downstairs at your house! She was serious, so I sent her a picture. Half an hour later she came down, saw me and said how cold it was outside. I said to her, “Where are we going? In the end, she said, “What time is it?” (Actually, it was about 9:00 a.m.) Let’s go upstairs and stay there. This is how I went up with her, at first in just sitting face to face, to be honest I really a little nervous, my heart is about to jump out. I was really nervous and my heart was about to burst. After sitting for a while, I said, “Let me give you a hug,” and reached out to hug her. We chatted like this, and I kissed her on the way out, but she didn’t resist. Then I asked her out to see a movie and held hands and kissed her face in the theater. I slowly realized that I was really in love with her, without her days I don’t want to do anything and don’t want to eat, so I lost less than 20 pounds. After the New Year’s Day holiday, my daughter-in-law will be at her mother’s house on my own, I said I would go with you in the evening, she said yes. This is how on the evening of the 1st I went to her home, to sleep when my hands are not honest up, slowly touched her breast, she laughed and said how to let you get away with it, I did not speak in the past to kiss her, she also responded warmly to me, down the road to take off her top, but just as I took off her panties when she suddenly stopped me and said do not want this. I said no, I don’t want to do it since you don’t like it, and it’s no fun to do it by myself, so I went to bed naked and held her all night. Until now she transferred away to another store, we also often find opportunities to be together, hugging and kissing, but never on the bed. Seriously, I love her very much, very much! I thought about getting a divorce to go through life with her, but every time I brought it up, she objected so strongly that I never mentioned it again. Tonight when I went to her and tried to hug her, she refused, saying that it was wrong to want to end the relationship. I really felt bad about it. So I decided to write about some of our past. Sometimes I also want a man to ignore me and I’ll ignore you, but I really can’t do it, every day I think of her, she is my barometer. The above is our story, there is no eroticism, but only a married man’s heartfelt love for a girl. Please don’t spray if you don’t like it. Please forgive the poor writing.
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I’ve written about my past with her before, but now that our relationship has come to an end, I’m feeling empty and I’d like to vent my feelings.
From the time I met her to the time I fell in love with her to the end of our relationship, a total of one winter, which you may think is short, but it brought me a deep-rooted affection. I have never had a girl in my life who has left such a clear mark on my heart and I can’t get rid of her.
It was mid-January, and her parents came to visit her early. At that time, I didn’t think we would have the chance to see each other again, but as soon as she had time, she came out to keep me company. We embraced and kissed in the stairwell of her rented apartment. I teased her and said, “I haven’t touched you in a long time. She just smiled and hugged me without speaking. But after the hug, she silently unbuttoned two buttons on her blouse neckline. I also made a gesture to reach inside, but when I reached the collar and touched her collarbone, I told her to fasten it, because the hallway was cold. (Not that I’m a gentleman, I don’t know what I was thinking at the time, but I didn’t touch her. Her parents bought her a house before they left, coincidentally in the neighborhood behind mine, and I was only a 5 minute walk from her. I was so happy. I wondered if it was fate that she was destined to be with me. I was planning with her what to buy for the house, greenery. We bought a long, thick, shaggy rug for the living room and bedroom, and watched TV together on the floor. Everything looked so beautiful. I was there when she moved and met with her parents. (Now that I think about it, maybe it was the meeting with her parents that led to all of this.) But when I first came to her house, her attitude toward me changed 180 degrees, and when I was outside I could hug and kiss her. When I was outside, I could hug her and kiss her. But in her house, she ignored me and was very annoyed with me. I was very confused and upset. But I didn’t think much of it. I continued to drive her to work and pick her up from work every day, holding hands in the car and kissing her face. Gradually I got used to this kind of life. But when I was at home, she was very cold to me. (To be honest, I had the idea to fuck her, but I didn’t do it because I felt that everything should be natural and I didn’t want her to pay anything intentionally)
Before she went home for the Spring Festival, on the evening of the 15th, I had a feeling that this might be the last night we would spend together, so at her house I showed my reluctance. I said: “Nothing, I just can’t see you for a few days, I’m afraid I miss you very much. As usual, we just hugged without eroticism. I waited for her reply and wanted to see if I had a place in her heart. From the 16th to the 20th, she only said a few simple words to me. I said, “I’ll pick you up at the airport at what time your plane leaves,” and the message I received was, “Don’t come, my plane is late. I said, “I’ll drive out at whatever time I want, and I can wait for you all night. But she still insisted that I didn’t have to pick her up, so I left the car at home, went drinking with friends, and then went singing again until 2:30 in the morning. I walked downstairs to her ghostly house, looked at the faint light in her house, and at that moment my heart ached, and then I silently went home. I thought, it’s over. I went to take her home, helped her take her things upstairs, and was ready to turn around and leave. She said, “Don’t you want to talk to me anymore? At that moment my heart couldn’t describe it. I went over and hugged her, and she hugged me, and I kept saying, “I miss you, I’ve missed you ever since you left. (See here you feel passionate, sorry no passion I’m such a wimp, kissed her once and I left. I didn’t want to do that, that would probably turn into a one-night stand, I didn’t want to, I was emotionally invested.) After I got home, I chatted with her briefly, picked her up and dropped her off at work as usual, and held hands and kissed her in the car.
A few days ago, I had a problem with my family. I was fed up with my life, the life where I could see death at a glance, the life with or without you, and I didn’t want to continue. I told her that I had a showdown with my family. I didn’t think I would get nothing in return but, “Don’t contact me anymore. At that moment, my heart was really broken. I don’t know if you have ever felt that kind of pain that makes it hard to breathe. As a man, I cried for two nights. I don’t believe I don’t have a place in her heart, so many hours and days of work in return for such a resolute reply. I tried my best to salvage it, but I was powerless to do so. In fact, I want to say that my divorce is not to ask her to live with me forever, I just want to take better care of her, openly and honestly to her to say I love you, and wait until she is tired of me before leaving me, so simple. As of today, I don’t resent her, I don’t blame her, I still love her, and everything is just between you and me. Now that I think about it, maybe she has been struggling to leave me since she moved to her new home, but she just couldn’t say it, and my impulsive showdown with my family just gave her the opportunity to do so. Now I’m not getting a divorce, and there’s no point. The old muddle of days continues.
Some people say that Sagittarius people are very flirtatious. I’m sorry you’ve met a different Sagittarius like me, but at least I’m serious about this relationship, and I can do it with a clear conscience to her. As for whether she is cheating on me, I don’t want to speculate, nor do I want to say anything bad about her.
But what I want to say is that sometimes love is very selfish, both for others and for yourself, you selfishly love someone will ignore the person’s feelings, since you can not give people the happiness they want, do not continue to dominate the other. I’m not sure if I’m going to be able to do that, but I’m not sure if I’m going to be able to do that. I don’t think it’s a pity that I didn’t sleep with her, I’m sorry that the places we promised to go together, we didn’t get the chance to go again. The pain in the heart to bear by yourself, the wound in the heart others can not see on the good.
It’s just that there’s nowhere to tell it to vent here, and by the way to pay tribute to this deceased relationship. There is no eroticism, just real emotion and love for a person. Today, I still love her very much. I wish her happiness!