In ancient China, the term “meet and greet” has always referred to a gift when people first meet, or a courtesy when they meet.
When the meeting gift meets the marriage between a man and a woman, there is a subtle variation between the two, and it represents a little more.
In many regions, the first visit to the home of a man or woman who has established a relationship with the other party will be of great importance to both parents. The meeting is to examine the future partner of their children, and the future happiness of their children is at stake.
So, the appropriateness of the meeting gift, which to some extent affects the initial perception of both parties, should be taken seriously. The first time you do this, you should not be careless and create unnecessary barriers for the future.
Particularly when the woman comes to the man’s house for the first time, the man should give the woman a more appropriate gift. In this regard, we can go over three aspects and give some constructive advice and precautions, namely: 1) the meetup gift represents respect and recognition; 2) the meetup gift is a kind of marriage inspection; and 3) the meetup gift is a constraint on marriage.
01Greetings represent respect and recognition
Since ancient times, China has been known as a “country of clothes and rituals”. This is a fine tradition that has been passed down to this day.
The third act of “Cui Yingying Listens to the Qin at Night”, in which Zhang Gong meets Hongniang and says, “I pay my respects to the little lady,” is sung by Hongniang, “then I see him with his forked hand, and I welcome him with my salute, ‘Hail, sir!
The “bowing” and “hail” are the common meeting rituals in ancient times, which not only express respect, but also provide a basis for subsequent communication.
Similarly, when a prospective daughter-in-law and prospective son-in-law first arrive at each other’s homes, they should also use the meeting rituals to lay the groundwork for subsequent communication and to facilitate the marriage.
The old adage that “manners are not strange” also applies to men and women meeting their parents for the first time. The “gift”, of course, is mutual and not given unilaterally. The “gift” is a sign of respect, and the “gift” is a sign of recognition for both men and women.
For example, if the woman goes to the man’s house for the first time with a gift for the two elders, and the man’s family gives her a suitable gift, this is a recognition of her status as a “prospective daughter-in-law” and a support and affirmation of the marriage; if the woman goes to the man’s house and the man doesn’t say anything, it means that he doesn’t pay enough attention to you, and doesn’t think much of your future marriage. The first thing you need to do is to get a good idea of what you want to do.
It is important to note that the recognition represented by the gift of meeting is definitely not the amount of red packets given to the woman, money does not represent the attitude of the other party, recognition and respect is more of an emotional expression.
Some people, who are not well off, take money out of courtesy, which is not worth advocating. The fact is that treating you from the heart is much more valuable than money and better expresses respect and recognition for you. The company’s main goal is to provide the best possible service to its customers.
02The gift of meeting is a marriage inspection
Frankly, the gift of meeting is more like a mirror, it will reflect the other family’s culture and atmosphere.
If the man’s family is too cheap and the woman comes to the house for the first time, nothing is prepared and the woman tells her parents about it afterwards, the answer will be clear.
Even to us outsiders, the beginning of this marriage did not open up, let alone the future of the marriage, and the future together.
The first time we went to the other’s home, the main purpose was to “field trip”.
When the woman decides to go to the man’s house, think about whether you’re ready or not, and don’t go into the first meeting blind. It is also important that you discuss this decision with your parents and listen to their opinions and give you an explanation of what to look for.
Marriage is not about the two of you, it’s about the family, so don’t ignore your parents’ feelings. You need to make this “marriage expedition” somewhat ritualistic and prepare for it, both in terms of etiquette and communication with your family, and try to make it as successful as possible.
And for the meetup, both men and women should use it as a messaging tool to pass on their goodwill to each other through the meetup. You can even think of it as a tool rather than an actual object or form.
This is the only way you can get a high perspective on what’s happening throughout the process and what you’re getting out of that first visit. This is a huge boost to the development of your marriage and the subsequent communication between the two parents.
03The gift of meeting is a constraint on marriage
The “gift of meeting” that is popular in modern marriage is not so easy to take, and you can’t afford it when your relationship is not secure and you don’t intend to stay together.
The “meet and greet” gift is a recognition by the other parent that you are a family member and a future partner who will be with your child for life, and this is a very solemn feeling that needs to be cherished by young men and women.
If you can’t understand this, think about what “giving a gift” means.
As we said above, giving you a gift is an acknowledgement of your status and an expectation of your future union. Beyond that, giving you a meet and greet is more about putting pressure on you as a couple to feel what your parents expect of you.
During your subsequent time together, it will dawn on you that there will be a subtle change in how you view each other’s identities. The other person no longer seems to be as simple as a lover, but a being who is to develop into a couple and spend the rest of their lives together. In this way, the meet-and-greet gift has actually become a catalyst for your romance, and moreover a benign constraint on your marriage.
This is a detailed explanation of the need for a “meet and greet”, but it is also necessary to list what “meet and greet” should be given. It’s also important to go over the list, which is key to the control of the “meet and greet”.
In our current marriage rituals, the relationship between gifts and money is particularly close, and in some regions there are even “regional standards” for the amount of gifts. However, is it really only possible to use money or valuables as a vehicle?
In fact, gifts should be diverse and take many forms to convey respect and recognition.
In fact, there is a variety of ways to convey respect and recognition, including the gift of a special item with heritage properties, the gift of respect and hospitality, and the gift of an appropriate red envelope.
In summary, this is an explanation of the need for a “meet and greet” gift, and I believe that when the woman (man) goes to the man’s (woman’s) house for the first time, parents will make a more appropriate choice.