The relationship status of women is just these kinds of: those who have been at the same table with the potential in junior high school and have never experienced anything else, but they can also persevere to the end; those who have been picking and choosing, those who have been experiencing, may have been compiled into the group of hating marriage; of course, there are always people who have developed a pair of wise eyes by falling down and getting up again and again, and eventually they have also picked a person who is the best and become a success. The more you choose, the more likely you are to find the right man and a long-lasting love, or the fewer times you fall in love, the better.
Does it depend entirely on fate to decide whether we find a good man, or is there something wrong with our own aspirations?
This depends on the person, but let’s also try to discuss it.
Zero-experienced
Opinion of users
LISA: Maybe it’s because of the first time I fell in love, I was so devoted to him that I wanted to give him everything, and sometimes I was said to be in love with no self. “
LISA: The first time I fell in love, I was so devoted to him that I wanted to give him everything. I’ve been taught to be “tactful” by experienced people, but I always feel that tactfulness is not real.
Ding: My boyfriend is my first love, but he has had several girlfriends before, and his sweet words are touching, but I often wonder if he has said them to others before. He has also hugged others like this? It makes me feel so unfair just thinking about it!
Baby: My boyfriend and I both had our first time with each other, and that’s fine. It’s like driving a car that someone else has driven, there’s always a time to break in and adjust, and some things remain unchangeable. But a new car it will grow into the best condition with the owner’s habits. It’s like this person I created with my own hands, how could it not fit?
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Case 1: Fear of comparing to “exes”
Mo says he was too busy working when he was “young” to fall in love.
More than a year ago, the company’s first ever “ex” was a woman with no relationship experience.
She met Sin at work and then met him at a friend’s dinner party, and a month later, she accepted his advances. Because he was an old friend of a good friend of hers, Mo learned that Sin had “seen a lot of women” before her. He is a department manager of a company with a good salary and a promising future. This made Mo very stressed because she cared about him too much, and she was curious to know how he really liked his girlfriend to treat him, so she asked his buddy out to find out about Sin’s history, not expecting to let him know about it later, and was angry about it, asking Mo what the hell she meant and why she was going over his old scores.
Mo was aggrieved, crying that she had a blank relationship history, needed to learn how to run this relationship, and lately had either been cooking a bad table or being kissed by him in the subway only to shyly leave him and run away. She wanted so badly to know what to do to excel over his ex …… Sin replied to her: just be yourself.
But Mo is still uneasy, and the other side of that unease is that she is not sure if she and Sin will have a future because she has no comparison, so she doesn’t know if Sin is the right one; and she is afraid that she is just a page in his relationship experience ……
Comments:
1. In a romantic relationship, internal comparison is actually the most taboo, but this kind of comparison is very common. For example, like XiaoMo. In fact, a good relationship should be when two people meet and move on together.
2. Men rarely distinguish a woman’s true heart from the amount of relationship experience. If he’s with you now, it’s not because you look like his ex or you have his ex’s good qualities, otherwise why would he give up his ex to find you. The first thing you need to do is to be good to yourself.
3. As for the dark little psychology of being unbalanced because he has more experience than you, hurry up and destroy it, you’re not blowing your own self-confidence. If you have any regrets, you’ll regret at best why you didn’t meet him before all his predecessors. And the truth is, the happiest woman around him is always the last one, not the first ……
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Case 2: He doesn’t know how to be gentle if he’s never been in love?
Sisi and Hiroko met in the student union in high school when both were members and spent a lot of time together and sparks came out. The two have been holding hands together for almost 5 years since the relationship was formalized, and they are each other’s first love. Everyone thinks that Si Si and Hao Zi are a match made in heaven, and everyone is envious of them.
But there was always a little bit of strange emotion in Si Si’s heart that disturbed her deer-like heart. The company’s main business is to provide a wide range of products and services, such as the Internet, the Internet, and the Internet. The company’s main goal is to provide the best possible service to its customers.
Watching TV and reading novels about other people’s boyfriends or husbands, one is more understanding than the other, knowing the hearts of women and saying things that make girls’ hearts burst with joy, making Sisi’s heart sour and sad, and taking the initiative to remind Haozi what to do, but he is always like a piece of wood, not enlightened. The company’s first-ever “The Best of the Best” is a new and innovative way to get the best out of the world. The company’s main goal is to provide a comprehensive range of products and services to the public. “The company’s main goal is to provide the best possible service to its customers.
2. What a man will do with the woman he loves is what the woman “teaches” him from the beginning.
2. A man’s ability to treat the woman he loves is something that women have taught him from the beginning.
3. It’s not illegal to leave your seat at any time because of outside temptation in a relationship, but it’s best to think twice before you get up. The company’s main goal is to provide the best possible service to its customers.
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Moderate
Netizen opinion
Jiang Wei: I think the reason why many of my parents’ generation got divorced later is that they ate the loss of getting it done once. At least you should have more contact with the opposite sex to know which one you are, right? The first thing you need to do is to find out that you’ve only been in love once in your life, which is depressing.
FLY: It’s not good to blindly pursue quantity. It’s better to learn something each time and make sure you don’t take the wrong path and make the same mistakes next time. So, it’s better to lock in a marriage goal after three or four relationships.
Lulu: It’s good to have a few relationship experiences, so you know what to value when you have a comparison. The problem is that you should not talk about your “exes” too often.
The thing guys are most afraid of is being compared! Even positive comparisons are inevitable.
Case 1: How many relationships does 4 count?
In fact, Xiao Xi doesn’t want to be in that many relationships. It’s just 4 times in total, is that much?
The first one was a college classmate, the boy was cool, but always grew up, and several times she went to him, always waiting for him for hours until he finished playing the game …… break up, she decided never again to find a childish man who could not manage time.
The second was introduced by someone else, not tall, freelance, but very caring. But, but he was surrounded by too many liuying, and from time to time a little cheating would break her heart, and after a year she decided to leave, saying she couldn’t forgive sharing her lover with someone.
The third one was an online acquaintance who could write nice words and was funny, and it was love at first sight. The first time I saw a man, I was a little bit of a jerk, but soon she decided not to go forward because the man was a drinker, and every time he got drunk he cursed, and every time she went to talk to him, she was beaten. She tried to spend months trying to convince him to stop drinking, but failed miserably and had to separate.
The fourth one is the current boyfriend, not as cool as the first one, not as loving as the second one, not as funny as the third one, he is even a little bit silly and cute, has a stable job, buys her small gifts from time to time, is never late for a date, and most importantly, he knows how to take care of her every thought.
Xiaoxi doesn’t know if this relationship is lifelong, but she says that every relationship is a happy experience, maybe with a bad downfall, but unfortunately you can’t deny the good times you had together.
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Reviews:
1. Love should end once and for all if it ends, never bring the shadow to the next man, it will be unfair to him, and don’t think the whole world is a roadie just because you have been hurt by a roadie …… love should make people happy and grow, not miserable.
2. For Xiao Xi, the experience of falling in love is part of the experience of life, and it is an important part. If experience is the wealth of life, then the experience of falling in love is good for one’s growth. We all really mature when we encounter a relationship regardless of the outcome.
3. Finally, I would like to remind some girls who have always lost all their love affairs that if you fall in love with one type of man each time and repeat one type of tragedy, it’s time to reflect on it, otherwise you will still have zero experience and never reach happiness after 100 relationships, and your broken heart will not heal with more experience… …
Case 2: The last relationship made you mature
Zhenzhen is married. Her husband is a project manager at an IT company and her second boyfriend. The company’s first boyfriend was a woman who had a three-year relationship that ended when he left the country for a long time.
Before she met her current husband, she was single for two years. It’s not that there aren’t men to pursue, and it’s not that there aren’t opportunities for dating, it’s just that True knows that a woman’s youth is too short to withstand one experience after another. But what kind of man is most suitable for you, and how do two men and women from different environments with different personalities during the love period, how to blend and operate with each other? The first thing you need to do is to read a novel or watch a movie, and you will only fall into a beautiful misunderstanding.
There are many girlfriends of the same age around her, who come to talk to her whenever they encounter unhappiness in love, and she is like a perfect sponge, absorbing everyone’s troubles and lessons, and then, keeping her mouth shut, turning them into her own. Although always an outsider, but she never blindly stirring live, and do not point fingers, but seriously from the comfort and comfort angle to communicate with each other. The company’s main goal is to provide the best possible service to its customers.
By the time she met her husband, she was well prepared to find the right match based on true love, to grasp his psychology, and to adjust her own mindset, to adapt to other people’s experiences from observation and absorption, and to arrive at happiness with each other soon.
Reviews:
1. We all know that it is not easy for people to heal themselves. If True is not smart enough, maybe she can be a good relationship expert, solving all kinds of relationship problems of her sisters around her, but not being able to solve any of her own emotional doubts.
2. It turns out that any experience can come not only from your own life experience, but also from others. The premise is that you have to have a pair of wise eyes, or see the handsome brother of small A philandering, it is believed that the handsome can not find; see small B’s boyfriend knows bubble net refused to work, it is believed that the Internet men are unreliable; see small C’s boyfriend went abroad on the change of heart will think that the distance is too far will certainly break up …… so on, your eyes in addition to the problem What else can men see?
3. Love sometimes requires taking the best of all worlds and trotting along to progress.
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Meeting people numerous types
Netizen Opinion Zone
Lin: Too many times in love, it becomes a game. The first thing you need to do is to make sure that you have a good idea of what you are doing.
I believe that these “love masters” will not know if they are still sincere in the end.
Xiao Ke: It’s a mess. I always hear some middle-aged, experienced people lamenting that falling in love is an endless repetition, nothing new. I think, love too many times, inevitably will make people numb. The first thing you need to do is to get a good idea of what you’re looking for, and you’ll find that there’s no one else in the world who can meet your needs. ……
White Wind: You can’t knock over a boatload of people with a single shot. The company’s main goal is to provide a better understanding of the relationship between men and women and how to get along with people. This is the kind of person who, once he has chosen a marriage partner, you can rest assured that it will be his last choice!
Case 1: Love to exhaustion
Xiaomi is not the kind of beauty at first glance, but looks clean and good temperament, a little talent, but also a good handwriting, can be said to be the inner type. The company’s main goal is to provide the best possible service to its customers. And Xiaomi’s advantage is that all aspects of the conditions are moderate, body, looks coordinated and smooth, talk and mannerisms are appropriate, talk witty and funny …… In short, Xiaomi is very manly. The company’s main goal is to provide the best possible service to its customers.
Xiaomi is a person who does not give up on the possibility of any relationship. The company’s main goal is to provide a platform for the development of a new generation of companies that will be able to meet the needs of their customers. However, Xiaomi around these as the direction of marriage and the choice of boyfriend is still coming and going, are not long. Whenever a relationship appears normal friction, arguments, contradictions, Xiaomi are unchanged in response to any effort, she said let him go, is your is your, not your efforts are useless. The state of Xiaomi’s relationship is getting tired, even after the breakup gap of more than two months are not anxious to find, and it is not that you can not find a suitable alternative.
Xiaomi said: now more and more lazy to start a new one, how at one time also talked about the conditions are particularly good, if now let me low on really can not, but the so-called good bar and all have problems. Because no matter who is replaced, after two months of dating I will clearly deduce the character traits of this person to continue the two will argue over what, unpleasant, twisted. The result will be like the previous situation with so-and-so …… Once you think about it, it’s no longer interesting to maintain the problem in this section at the moment and lose patience. The only criteria I have now is that this person should be liked by my family.
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Reviews:
1. This is a typical sultry type of player, too aware of her own strengths is sometimes not a good thing, too easy to take herself seriously. There is a literary girl complex, and empiricism.
2. Can’t stand loneliness like to experience, and put up a literary model of seeing through the world and knowing the fate of the world. The company’s main goal is to provide a platform for the development of a new generation of companies that will be able to provide the best possible service to their customers.
3. After a certain age, this kind of person is most likely to be high on the road to choosing a spouse, and this type of student is still open because everyone is silly and does not understand, and in the adult world this kind of middle-aged female literary youth is left not surprising.
Case #2: A woman who has been through the wringer
Jialing is a dynamic person who is bold, direct but not stupid, and feminine, and has the charm to be both strong and soft, making her a sought-after love baby. In the long journey of love she has experienced, experienced, hurt, also been hurt, being pursued, also actively pursued others. There are even a few shocking emotional events that have been widely circulated by her friends or alumni. The first time I saw her, I was able to get to know her.
Perhaps because of God’s blessing, or perhaps because of her own wisdom in life, Jia Ling has always had a good mindset and character, and she almost always instinctively makes the best choice for herself at the critical moment in the face of danger. And after every love storm, Jia Ling is able to reshuffle and organize herself quickly, like a new computer after reformatting, friends can clearly feel that Jia Ling has grown a point, long is wisdom rather than worldly. The company’s main focus is on the development of a new product, which is a new product for the company.
After a few milestone relationships, she met her perfect husband. Jia Ling synthesized all her previous relationship experiences to create a new self, starting over, avoiding any problems that might arise, getting through the getting-to-know-you period, the bonding period, and finally successfully marrying herself.
Reviews:
1. Simplicity after complexity is a realm.
2. The more experience many people have, the easier it is to put up a stance of a dead pig not afraid of boiling water. The rebellion and chaos of youth is a kind of character and age, which can be justified, but it is difficult to get a normal man to marry you. Self-destructive broken jars of gray mentality will make any mature man to play the right spectrum are bypassed. The first thing you need to do is to give your healing to save the broken-winged angel and then marry it home, that’s a romance novel, don’t fantasize and apply it to yourself, that’s not sentimental but silly.
3. Jia Ling is a smart woman who knows how to adjust herself after tossing and turning and make the right choice after understanding what she wants. The experience can make life rich, learn to extract the positive elements of it, and know how to grasp and use it to make yourself happy.
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Bi Jin Yi: Counselor, counseling direction: love marriage, interpersonal psychological problems, family problems co-counseling.
Shopping around is a common shopping technique used by many savvy buyers, and many parents fear that their children will miss out on the possibility of better conditions if they establish a relationship with the opposite sex too early, sometimes even using this technique to convince their children in hot relationships. Of course there is no shortage of people who have unique requirements for marriage, voluntarily as a choice of spouse as the principle of no two. So just how many times is it appropriate to lock in a relationship?
The answer is: the fewer times, the better.
According to psychologists, people tend to whitewash past relationship memories as they complicate their personal experiences as they get older: the good stuff is increasingly preserved, creating a strong contrasting effect on current emotional experiences.
The comparisons mostly result in a feeling of disappointment in the present and more attachment to the past, with each comparison being a process of purification of the memories again. The more comparisons we make, the less hope we have for success and the stronger the thought of “maybe we can meet someone better in the future”. This is the self confusion that prevents happiness and success in the relationship process.
Tips:
1. The accumulation of self-confusion comes from life: the criteria for choosing a spouse are refined again and again, but the person who can be a perfect match is slow to appear, too subjective to their own fantasies of being in the right seat, inevitably missing the opportunity. It’s like taking a ready-made frame to buy the right painting, how easy it is, and such obstacles are clearly set for yourself.
2. The experience of multiple unfulfilled marriages can lead to a strange circle of people who believe that love should be discussed for a long time, and in the long run, the shortcomings of the other party will be revealed in an unusually harsh manner whenever the marriage is discussed, plus the self confused people are very good at comparing people to each other, and it is more difficult to decide.
3. The other confusion component of self confusion: many self confused people are soft-eared, they are easily influenced by the words of others, and the object they bring home to see is immediately distracted by the gossipy comments of onlookers.
Advice: Establish a benign concept of choosing a spouse, know yourself reasonably, or as the saying goes, “know how many bowls of rice you eat,” and rectify the conditions of the other party to an appropriate and achievable level; treat other people’s feelings sincerely and fairly in a relationship, and do not engage in unnecessary comparisons that get you into trouble; moreover, you need to build self-confidence and base your happiness on the adult perception of being independent, daring, and responsible.