Why are so many women so anxious when they can’t find a boyfriend at marriageable age? Because traditional society has instilled in us the notion that a good home is the cause of a woman’s life. Is that really the case?
Like at a certain age, everyone around you starts to worry about you as if you should rightfully be happy at 30…but a marriage certificate doesn’t guarantee happiness, and rather than making finding a good home a goal in life, let’s all first We should all have the ability to make ourselves happy first.
Psychologically speaking, people who can’t love, appreciate, and respect themselves rarely reap the benefits of pure love. Only those who love, appreciate and respect themselves are likely to gain the appreciation of some highly qualified men. Why? Because the most beautiful love is found in oneself. Do you agree with this statement?
Whether it’s a traditional idea instilled in us by society or read by friends and family around us, it seems that a woman must trust her life to a man. For example, find a man who can be entrusted for life. Why can’t we work hand in hand with a man to run our lives together? Is it because we can’t take responsibility for ourselves? No.
If we had to dig deeper into this question, it would involve about the meaning of marriage. It has gradually become a traditional habit for men to get married when women get married. In recent years, society has undergone dramatic changes, and many concepts have been updated with the changes in material society, but the desire and expectation for marriage does not seem to have been updated. On the contrary, because of the examples seen in this reality, betrayal and cheating have become more common, and the traditional marriage vows seem to be more scarce.
At a certain age, women inevitably start receiving red bombs from friends, family, high school classmates and college friends. Many women can’t help but feel envious deep inside at this time, and some may feel fearful, but when women get married and have children at this time, it means they will definitely get happiness? In fact, it is not. The real life is different from fairy tales, finding a prince husband who can last a lifetime, and being able to be happy forever often does not necessarily equate.
Marriage doesn’t mean happiness
At a dinner party, a friend who came back from studying in the United States suddenly asked: “What do you think? The first time I came back from the U.S., a friend suddenly asked, “Why do I feel like everyone is desperately looking for someone to ‘build a nest’? What is this mentality?” We all looked at each other and didn’t know how to answer his question until someone said, “It’s not a ‘mentality’, it’s a ‘norm’.”
The following are two phrases we must have all heard before.” Find a good husband.”” The most important thing a woman can do in her life is to find a good home.”
“Find a good husband.” It’s a hard thing to do, and most people just “find a man”.
“The most important thing in a woman’s life is to find a good home”, not “a man who loves her. The most important thing in a woman’s life is to find a good home, not “a man who loves her”. The reason for this is that it is a “marriage certificate”, which has limited validity and can be cancelled at any time.
Finding a good husband is better than finding yourself…
What exactly does a marriage certificate count for?
How long is love valid for? The effective period is that long before the other person or yourself change your mind. And what does the guarantee of marriage guarantee? If the marriage certificate is a contract, then it is the most paradoxical kind of contract in the world, not only can not guarantee anything, the most puzzling thing is that it can also cancel the contract at any time. A marriage certificate, behind what actually represents quite limited. The company’s main goal is to provide the best possible service to its customers.
Marriage in the name of love
Marriage is not the grave of love, but it is not a guarantee for every person. The first thing you need to do is to make sure that you have a good idea of what you are getting into. The most important thing is that it is only one of the stops in love. The first thing that you need to do is to get a good idea of what you are getting into. The marriage that is made purely out of love is really an attitude of each person showing a responsibility and willingness to give commitment to his or her love.
Simply from the marriage certificate itself, this book is just a proof that you and so-and-so decided to walk into marriage together on such-and-such a date and month. It exists as a filing in itself. It becomes a guarantee because it is a symbol of a proper marriage in a situation where cheating and betrayal are common. But so what? This is no longer the feudal era of three hundred years ago.
Marriage does not guarantee love, nor does it guarantee a future, and sometimes turns into the biggest crisis of all in itself. The marriage certificate of Theo, which is circled on the outer edge of the marriage, represents less than what you thought it would mean when you were a child.
Marriage doesn’t bind love, but love can hold on to marriage, and it’s love we want to run, not marriage. The first thing we need to do is to make the relationship longer, longer and sweeter, or to go back and strengthen the love, and what makes the love stronger is the “those two people” in the marriage, not the “marriage certificate”.
Maybe society is changing too fast, or maybe the traditions passed down from our fathers are too stubborn, and now we are being pushed to get married at the age of 30. But many people are not yet aware of the difference between love and marriage, or have not yet figured out how to take responsibility for a home, a woman’s life, the responsibility of a child’s father, they subconsciously avoid walking into marriage. Or they muddle through marriage for the sake of the expectations of their elders, to escape social opinion, and to do what needs to be done when they are old enough to get married.
For many people, it’s eventually time to walk into marriage and walk the path that their fathers walked. It’s just that the situation we face is already different from our fathers’ generation, and the requirements for marriage are different from each other. What we value more is that we work hand in hand with each other and are partners in life. This requires that we need to have the ability to make ourselves happy.
The ability to make yourself happy requires, first and foremost, being financially independent. No matter how much money you earn, it is the result of your own labor. Second, have certain demands and plans for yourself. This allows us to walk better and more steadily without muddling through. Again, clear in mind what kind of life you want to live. This point is actually combined with the previous two points. No matter what kind of action you take, the ultimate goal is to achieve the state of life you want to live. Finally, everyone comes together, to act and implement.
Happiness is not an extra layer of security with more people. Happiness is something you have to think about, discover, practice, and actively engage with in order to truly have.