For couples, falling in love is a simple matter, as long as the two are in love, there is nothing to stop it, but couples are not easy to get along with each other, because they are two separate individuals, often because of certain things quarrel, in fact, from most couples quarrel issues, it is easy to find the common reasons for their frequent quarrels. The problem is that it is not difficult to find the common reasons for their frequent quarrels, and these reasons are also the way to crack the couples quarrel.
There is a song that says “Love is always easy to get along too hard”, and for young couples in the 80s and 90s nowadays, it perfectly illustrates the saying that no matter how much they love each other, two people will inevitably fight. It is inevitable that two people, no matter how much they love each other, will quarrel. So why do couples fight? Here is an expert’s comprehensive analysis of the common problems that couples fight about these days.
1. “I’m talking to you! This is more important than the TV!”
Women must be clear: men can’t watch TV and talk to you about serious things at the same time, he’s not sitting in front of the TV and being fascinated by the It’s just that their “capacity” or brain doesn’t allow them to multitask at the same time.
There are two ways to solve this problem. First, you have to accept the fact that he can only listen to you for three minutes straight, so try to be brief and finish before he loses focus. In addition, you can ask him a question about this after the end, so that he can participate in the event, if you just let the man listen to him he may quickly desert, but unknowingly pulled into the topic by you, he will talk about the topic may be eloquent. It’s also a way to keep him focused by gently touching his arm or leg to call his mind back from Java.
2. “Oh my God, I have to tell you something ……”
The difference in how men and women react to such “warning” statements is another major difference between men and women. Women like to have a warm-up process before a problem occurs to make sure they don’t get crushed or stunned, even if it’s not that serious. But men will interpret this kind of talk as a signal to turn on the protection mode, and even think that it is a kind of ominous prophecy that will definitely become reality if said. When he hears the truth he will instinctively object or refute you, even if what you say is simply: Can you lend your car to my friend for a day?
So for the sake of your boyfriend’s heart health and emotional well-being, instead of starting the sentence with “I have bad news” followed by what you want to say, just say it with a big smile. It’s not important, my grandmother is having her 80th birthday and the family wants to invite you there, they want to meet you ……”. I can guarantee that this will get a much more positive and enthusiastic response.
3. “I said all that and you didn’t hear a thing!”
There’s nothing more frustrating than when you’re telling him a funny story you came across with your eyebrows raised, but his eyes are vacant or even his expression You know he’s reacting fast to what you’ve said and it drives you crazy. It’s not that he doesn’t care what you’ve come across that’s interesting, it’s that your friends’ opinions on the matter are interspersed with your own, and all he hears is a few gasps and gibberish.
Simply, men don’t have the ability to understand details, and the limit of time they can sink their teeth into is three minutes. Women who don’t understand this, of course, freak out over it, and men are left stumped wondering where they went wrong.
4. “It’s so simple, why can’t you always remember!” — Insufficient information exchange
Couples talk to each other in a very different way than they use with their friends, so used to keeping key parts hidden or deliberately unspoken because they think the two are one and the other should easily know what they’re thinking, even if they don’t say a word. Only when it comes down to it do they realize that everything is a mess, feeling ignored and left out, and all sorts of problems surface.
This phenomenon can affect the relationship between two people, and it’s actually a very easy problem to solve. When it is necessary to explain, please explain everything to him in as much detail as possible, just as you do when you are handing over work to your subordinates or discussing things with your colleagues in the company. If he talks to you about a plan, you should also ask as many details as possible, and the best way to communicate is for the two of you to discuss and eventually agree around the key parts. If you have time to send a humorous video or a little colorful joke to a colleague during work hours, how about texting him to discuss which restaurant would be a good place for you to have dinner with your foxes and friendshappy.