1. If you are not in the game, you don’t know what is right and wrong.
When you don’t know the truth, you don’t know the whole picture, you don’t know the cause and effect, you shouldn’t generalize, you shouldn’t listen to the wind and the rain, you shouldn’t stand and talk. The first thing you need to do is to make sure that you have a good idea of what you are doing.
2. Don’t interfere blindly and don’t take away opportunities for growth.
Everyone’s growth process is directed by themselves, scripted by themselves, and led by themselves, regardless of the relationship, and if the other person resists, don’t intervene blindly and forcefully in the name of “for their own good. This will not only worsen the relationship, but will also deprive others of the opportunity to discover more beautiful moments in their journey of growth because of your own excessive subjectivity. If the worst happens, and if it doesn’t hurt anyone else, we should encourage them to move forward with kindness and respect.
Sometimes it’s not a good idea to hit the south wall, so that you know where your ceiling is, where your limits are, where your opportunities are, and to develop a strong core of courage and an independent and rounded thinking system.
3. Cherish the fruits of others’ labor.
The work of others, even if you are paid for it, should not be trampled on blindly, as this will not only hurt others’ recognition of their value, but also distort your own values in life.
For example:
lCultivate the habit of saying thank you to the service person for his or her service.
If you can’t eat out, tell the restaurant that you’re full, not their problem.
I bought clothes, picked them out, and put the ones that didn’t fit back in place.
And so on.
4. Treat people like yourself and be genuine.
If the other person treats you sincerely, you should treat him as yourself, and treat him as you would like him to treat you, and give him what he wants to take.
For example:
(1) Be happy because he is happy, happy because he is successful, proud because he is excellent;
(2) When the other party is in a state of chaos, encourage him from the heart;
(3) Believe in people, but doubt them, set a stop-loss line, and exchange hearts for hearts.
Everyone has both good and bad sides to their personality, and when you reflect good energy on those who deserve to be treated that way, the good energy that comes back to you over time is divine and tremendous.
5. If it doesn’t work out, break it off when it does.
For example:
I was already in conflict with the other person at the beginning of the contact
I didn’t want to agree to the other person’s request
I came to a point in my life where I was going in a different direction
So I should stop in time and break off when I could, for my own good and for the good of others, without delay.
If you always cover up, you’re not connected, and you don’t know what you’re doing, it may seem like you’re being nice, but this “hypocrisy” will only make both sides waste their lives in a never-ending mutual consumption, which is not beneficial.
6. Don’t be greedy for others to fulfill your dreams.
For parents, for partners, for children, if you can understand that each person is independent of the other and has his or her own life, you should not put your “greed” and “unfulfilled dreams” on the other person, such as:
Wanting to
I hope he will help me to get rich
I hope he will be able to do everything
This is a great kindness.
7. Understand that people have limitations and do not put themselves on a pedestal to suppress others.
When it comes to communicating with people and encountering bottlenecks, first don’t be resentful and blame it on others’ intelligence quotient emotional quotient adverse quotient, but understand that getting angry at others will only add insult to injury and become unchangeable, making each other self-denying while both sides can’t produce efficient communication, so you might as well switch your perspective to slightly “downgrade the frequency” based on each other’s ability to understand.
8. Cherish the strength of other people’s hearts, and do not blindly dump your emotions on others.
The clear understanding that everyone has their own weather, and that you are difficult and he is difficult, so it is better to smooth yourself out, analyze yourself, resolve yourself, and communicate with others after you have clear thinking, than to turn into Mrs. Xianglin and harm yourself when you have a bad feeling. The first thing you need to do is to take a look at the actual situation.
9. Be kind to yourself.
The external world is a projection of one’s own state of mind, as in:
A person who likes to speculate maliciously about others has evil thoughts in his heart.
The inability to trust others is due to the inability to trust oneself.
The tendency to complain about others is due to the tendency to complain about oneself.
Therefore, the root of keeping good will toward others is to keep good will toward oneself, to love him well, to trust him, to keep him, to care for him, to understand him, so that there is a surplus of light and heat in the heart, so that this can benefit the external world and form the birth of good will.
The above is shared in the hope that it will illuminate you.
Love you and cheers❤️