In today’s society, there are too many of us who are always insecure, especially women. Women are born emotional creatures, they are not used to analyzing everything in themselves with a rational mind, and this is precisely one of the most important aspects that constitute a fatal hardness in their psyche. I am a man, but I am used to unleashing the rationality of a man from a woman’s standpoint, and this is the gain and celebration I can feel. Here, I would like to write out my urgent psychological feelings and share them with you, especially I hope to learn for the majority of women friends. I think all the insecure feelings in women’s hearts come from the six deadly hard wounds inside them.
First of all, most women are blindly devoted to love.
Strictly speaking, true and pure love is extremely rare in this world, and if it exists, it will die because of the unsuitability of the water. This is a rather pessimistic reality, and I am in no way an alarmist. So if you are too hard on love, you are only asking for trouble and disaster. In the eyes of Westerners, love is more often than not just a fun game with emotional investment, almost no one will see it as bigger than the sky, so some girls will fall out of love seven or eight times in a month or even ten times. And love in the eyes of Chinese women, from the moment of sexual awakening will take it as a lifelong unique cause, and even life can not want, but love can not be without, and once the love has gone wrong or is not, the blow and damage to them is subversive. I think this hysteria is against the original intention of love, love itself is not the hope to get some joy and happiness from it? If there is no joy and happiness, why do we need to force love? The question really deserves some thought.
Secondly, there are many women who are born kind, intelligent and capable.
They love the world in their hearts and care about everyone around them, especially their loved ones and lovers, and they are ready to give their lives, but unfortunately not themselves. They pay too much attention to the feelings of the people around them, do anything to get used to thinking about “how others will look at me”. So women’s ears are very soft, do any one thing as long as they hear the voice of opposition, they tend to retreat and hesitate. This is the sadness of women that I have always been unable to tolerate, this helpless smile to tear their soul and body behavior is extremely contrary to human nature. In the long run, it will definitely hurt a woman’s internal organs.
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Again, nine and a half out of ten women are extremely sensitive.
I believe that most men resent this trait in women. The most typical representative in Chinese literature is Lin sister Daiyu, who is so sensitive that she doesn’t cry two or three times a day to get to the head of the man who loves her, and who can’t stand it after a long time. So Lin sister’s hard wound constitutes her ultimate life tragedy, in fact, Cao Xueqin’s portrayal has a very strong realistic meaning. The first time I saw a woman, I was very impressed with her sensitivity, but I hope that more often than not, they will be delicate, considerate, and moderately disciplined, rather than allowed to expand and overstay their welcome.
Also, many Chinese women lack the passion that women should have.
Almost 100% of women like romance, but in reality, often less than half of women really know how to be romantic, and less than a third of women can make their own romance. Chinese women are always subtle and reserved, and when love and marriage suffer setbacks, the first thing they think of is that their men don’t know how to be romantic, and few of them really realize that they actually have more romantic potential than men. Why do you have to put too much of this so-called romance and interest in a man who is not very good at romance? Many women have a lot of conditions attached to the pursuit of romance and interest, and they always think too much about material conditions before creating interest. The actual love should be expressed in many places in life, and never narrowly let the humor only become the patent of men.
At the same time, I’ve always believed that most Chinese women have a deep gender stigma inside.
They always believe that “a woman’s lack of talent is virtue”, and more often than not, they like to be satisfied with the status quo, subconsciously putting the standard of women’s judgment below men’s, too constrained by their own identity as women, so we often hear women say about themselves. “I can achieve this as a woman is already very good”. In fact, this is a statement with a clear self-pity complex, often before they have experienced it, but prematurely surrendered to men.
Lastly, things like “three women are one show” and “where there are more chickens, there is more shit, and where there are more women, there is more right and wrong” are another hard psychological wound for women to overcome, and that is to talk about the rights and wrongs of others.
For a long time I couldn’t figure out why several women could come together and chat for hours without getting tired. Now it seems that they have their own hobby orientation, that is, they can get pleasure and happiness in the mind when chatting and talking about others, and how can they easily feel tired when they are happy together? But this hobby is very bad, a little carelessness will cause some of the days of resentment and hatred of the right and wrong. I think the phrase “long-winded woman” must have come from this, and this kind of hard feelings are difficult to overcome in most women’s lives.
These are the six deadly wounds that I think are common in Chinese women, the root cause of most of the tragedies and misfortunes of women, the negative effects on women and society should not be underestimated, and it is worthwhile for each woman to reflect deeply, and men should give a high degree of understanding and proper guidance.