I am an ordinary girl who has gone from elementary school to college to love to work and marriage without many ups and downs. It has been very satisfying as well. My current husband, whom I have known for nearly 10 years and been married to for more than 5 years, met in college, two years above me. He was born in the countryside, the university is also on loans, but very competitive, working alone, income is very good people also hardworking, especially filial piety. The nature of his job dictates that he travels two-thirds of the year, and all I can do is work well and wait for him to come back at home, and the two of us are sweetly together, because we spend a lot of time apart, and each time we feel we don’t stay with him enough.
The deterioration in our situation started with the birth of our baby. The first week before the due date, my mother-in-law came, and my mother came about a month before the birth, during which time the two had a lot of spats, my mother felt that the family did not care about me but only about the child, and sometimes the words were not good, and I also had grievances against my mother-in-law; and my mother-in-law felt short of people, and was even more angry, and from the first day she lived at home she went out to her son and cried, which I knew afterwards, and the day after she was discharged from the hospital I felt relieved when my mother-in-law was sent home by my son. The first day of the month, my husband and mother had a big fight against each other, my husband felt that both my mother and I were bullying my mother-in-law, and for this reason my husband wrote a divorce agreement, although in the end there was no divorce, but the days could not go back to the old days, and the two parents were at a standstill.
When the child was more than one year old, my husband and I fell into a cold war, and then I happened to find him chatting happily with a young girl online, looking at the chat log time, all by myself with the child, while looking forward to the time when he could say a few words to me to give me a call. I approached him for a showdown, and he promised not to mess around.
But, it was no longer easy for either of us, and I cried basically every night for six months while holding the baby. I went to a psychiatrist who said there was mild gloom and mania and that I needed to communicate more with my husband, which I was doing a poor job of, and the other person seemed to be too. I wish he spent that much time at home with me or with me and the kids, and went out as a family to look around, and the number of times the kids went out together when they were almost two couldn’t be used on one hand!
The current situation is that they had another big fight, he got physical, I threw things, and he said he wanted a divorce. After that I went back to my mother’s house with the kids and didn’t say a word for a week. My father was angry and told me to go back home immediately after I finished.
I didn’t think about the property, I was bent on him myself. The house was bought by him before the marriage, and he just gives me some living expenses every month. Two cars were bought in my name, and I could not even want them. The words of the quarrel and the understanding of his temper, he should not let me a penny in the property, according to his words, I should get out of the house on it! He basically doesn’t care much about my job, and my income is really dispensable compared to it.
As a woman, I failed miserably at wanting my husband to care about me, but using extreme methods thinking it would get him to care seemed counterproductive.